The Troll spot

OK yal post all hilarious trolling experiences here. Ill start
You: STARRRSCREAAAMMMM!!!!
Stranger: u no whats weird?
You: Gay people
Stranger: thats mean
You: I just dont get what the big deal is with stickin it in another bros ass
Stranger: hey 8, 10, or 11?
You: hmm
You: What if i said 8? hypothetically
Stranger: just pick one. u wanna pick 8?
You: Lets pretend i chose 10, what would happen?
Stranger: look, just pick one.
You: What about 11? would something cool happen?
Stranger: JUST. PICK. ONE. please.
You: You are grumpy... let me guess canadian?
Stranger: uh no.
Stranger: pick one dude!
You: ermm
You: British?
Stranger: sure.
Stranger: now. pick. one.
You: You limey bastard!
Stranger: ...
Stranger: r u done?
You: Perhaps, mr. potter
Stranger: racist.
You: What were the numbers again?
Stranger: anyways
Stranger: 8, 10, or 11
You: Ok lets roleplay a situation, "I pick 8." What do u say now
Stranger: no, u need 2 pick a number
Stranger: not roleplay one
You: You want me to pick 2?
Stranger: just pick one.
You: ok i pick one
Stranger: okay 8, 10, or 11.
You: i picked one, like you told me too
Stranger: i never said that.
Stranger: so 8, 10, or 11.
You: You literally said "Just pick one." So i did
Stranger: yep, just pick one : 8, 10, or 11.
You: Then why tell me to pick one?
You: You are confusing
Stranger: i didnt.
Stranger: u make this confusing.
Stranger: 8, 10, or 11.
You: You did scroll up 12 bars, you said "just pick one"
You: Im just trying to appease your hunger for me to pick a number
Stranger: yeah, just pick one : 8, 10, or 11.
You: So you wont me to pick one+8+10 or pick 11?
Stranger: yeah.
You: ok i pick one eight and 10
Stranger: pick 8, 10, or 11.
You: What happened to one?
You: did u just rule it out?
Stranger: sure.
You: Thats cheap, i was gonna go with one
Stranger: well sorry. ones gone.
Stranger: pick
Stranger: 8
Stranger: 10
Stranger: or
Stranger: 11
You: Ok, lets for fun say that i walked up to you and shouted out "eleven!" what would you say back to me
Stranger: i would say pick one.
You: Ok i pick one
Stranger: okay.
Stranger: so ur a guy
You: Well not exactly, but you can say that
Stranger: okay
Stranger: so ur a guy
Stranger: u'll never get married, grow bald, and die alone.
Stranger: prick.
You: Well when you have a penis and vagina
You: You dont need to have a boyfriend
You: or girlfriend
You: you of all people should know this
Stranger: okay im not a doctor, but i would say u need 2 get that checked out.
You: Im not taking advise by some HOBO playing doctor
Stranger: yeah, u should find a real doctor.
You: Your mom should go to the doctor, she is pregnant with my child.
You: Actually
You: we will go together
Stranger: really? so u r a guy!
You: Me and your lovely mother
Stranger: (:
You: Well
You: like i said
You: not exactly
Stranger: so my moms not pregnant.
Stranger: and ur gonna die alone
You: She is..
You: but
You: Im not officially a guy
Stranger: yeah, as i said, u need 2 get that checked out by a doctor
You: Lets just say I have the best of both worlds like Hannah montana
You: One world.
You: I am banging ur mom
You: the other
You: I am getting banged by ur dad
Stranger: yeah, u need 2 get that checked.
You: If the kid is a boy or girl?
Stranger: i dont wanna be personal, but how do u pee like that
You: Do you wish to know the truth?
Stranger: yeah.
You: Are you sure you want to know the truth about me?
Stranger: yeah.
You: I am an average housecat DONT BE ALARMED! my father, a scientist gave me a pill that lets me speak enlgish for 20 minutes or so I must tell you this as cats we know the exact date the world will end,I had to test you at first but it is imperative i tell you meow meow meow meooowww
You: meow
You: meowwww!
Stranger: so im like imagining this, and so ur a cat. and u have a penis and a vagina.
Stranger: wow, ur screwed

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
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You: Gotcha!
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Stranger: hi 23 m virgin
You: lol
You: made my night hahahahhaha
You: hahahahhaa
Stranger: wow boring night then?
You: good luck in the future bro hahahahhahahah

this is now a competition. Best Troll wins.

Stranger: for the love of God i'm not horny
You: Liar.
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You: Are you now?
Stranger: i like my women like i like my whiskey: 10 years old and mixed up with coke.

Stranger: How do you know about guns?
You: i play cod
Stranger: Yeah but that's just a game.
You: my dad was in the army for a while
Stranger: I'm gonna buy and test these babies on a range.
You: but he got discharged, lost his arms.
Stranger: Oh. Damn.
Stranger: Im sorry.
You: in northern russia, digging up old war artifact type things.
You: Don't know the whole story.
Stranger: ...
Stranger: Fishy.
You: I guess it's because...in Soviet Russia, bomb disarms you.

Me and matix ran into each other!!! rofl
ou're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: ASL OR
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Stranger: lair!
You: HOMO!
Stranger: FAGGOT
You: I love you gurl!
You: jackpot!!!!!
Stranger: JACKPOTTTTTT
You: this is so awesome
Stranger: Out of all these people babe, you got me.
You: Meant to be
Stranger: Of course!!!
You: I am in awe of how amazing this is
Stranger: Fresh out the kitchen momma rollin that body got every man in ignition
You: ok
You: enough of this lol
Stranger: My names Chayce
You: I AM SLEDGE FROM BEL
You: AKA EDDIE
You: lol
You: AKA ROBOTO
Stranger: I AM CHEF FROM BEL
You: AKA LADY GAGA
Stranger: AKA YOGAFLAME
Stranger: AKA MATIX
You: AKA TITS MCGEE
Stranger: AKA DMARC
Stranger: lol

Stranger: ASL OR
Stranger: ………………….._,,-~’’’¯¯¯’’~-,,
………………..,-‘’ ; ; ;_,,---,,_ ; ;’’-,…………………………….._,,,---,,_
……………….,’ ; ; ;,-‘ , , , , , ‘-, ; ;’-,,,,---~~’’’’’’~--,,,_…..,,-~’’ ; ; ; ;__;’-,
……………….| ; ; ;,’ , , , _,,-~’’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ¯’’~’-,,_ ,,-~’’ , , ‘, ;’,
……………….’, ; ; ‘-, ,-~’’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’’-, , , , , ,’ ; |
…………………’, ; ;,’’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’-, , ,-‘ ;,-‘
………………….,’-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’’-‘ ;,,-‘
………………..,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;__ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘-,’
………………,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,-‘’¯: : ’’-, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; _ ; ; ; ; ;’,
……………..,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;| : : : : : ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ,-‘’¯: ¯’’-, ; ; ;’,
…………….,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘-,_: : _,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; | : : : : : ; ; ; |
……………,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ¯¯ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’-,,_ : :,-‘ ; ; ; ;|
…………..,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ,,-~’’ , , , , ,,,-~~-, , , , _ ; ; ;¯¯ ; ; ; ; ;|
..…………,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,’ , , , , , , ,( : : : : , , , ,’’-, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;|
……….,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’, , , , , , , , ,’~---~’’ , , , , , ,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’,
…….,-‘’ ; _, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘’~-,,,,--~~’’’¯’’’~-,,_ , ,_,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘,
….,-‘’-~’’,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; | ; ; | . . . . . . ,’; ,’’¯ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ,_ ; ‘-,
……….,’ ; ;,-, ; ;, ; ; ;, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘, ; ;’, . . . . .,’ ;,’ ; ; ; ;, ; ; ;,’-, ; ;,’ ‘’~--‘’’
………,’-~’ ,-‘-~’’ ‘, ,-‘ ‘, ,,- ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘, ; ; ‘~-,,,-‘’ ; ,’ ; ; ; ; ‘, ;,-‘’ ; ‘, ,-‘,
……….,-‘’ ; ; ; ; ; ‘’ ; ; ;’’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘’-,,_ ; ; ; _,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ;’-‘’ ; ; ; ‘’ ; ;’-,
……..,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;¯¯’’¯ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; , ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’’-,
……,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ,, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; |, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘-,
…..,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;|..’-,_ ; ; ; , ; ; ; ; ; ‘,
….,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; | ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,’…….’’’,-~’ ; ; ; ; ; ,’
…,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’~-,,,,,--~~’’’’’’~-,, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,’…..,-~’’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ,-
…| ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,’…,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,-‘
…’, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ,’….’, ; ; ; ; _,,-‘’
….’, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ,-‘’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,’…….’’~~’’¯
…..’’-, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;_,,-‘’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ,-‘
………’’~-,,_ ; ; ; ; _,,,-~’’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,-‘
………..| ; ; ;¯¯’’’’¯ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,,-‘
………..’, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,-‘
…………| ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;|
…………’, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ~-,,___ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’,
………….’, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,-‘….’’-, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘,
………..,’ ‘- ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,-‘’……….’-, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘,
……….,’ ; ;’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ,,-‘…………….’, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’,
………,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,-‘’…………………’’-, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; |
……..,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,,-‘………………………’’, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; |
……..| ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,’…………………………,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;,’
……..| ; ; ; ; ; ; ,’………………………..,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ,’’
……..| ; ; ; ; ; ;,’……………………….,-‘ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ,-‘
……..’,_ , ; , ;,’……………………….,’ ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ,-‘
………’,,’,¯,’,’’|……………………….| ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘--,,
………….¯…’’………………………..’-, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’’~,,
……………………………………………’’-,, ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;’’~-,,
………………………………………………..’’-, ; ; ; ; ; ,,_ ; ;’-,’’-,
…………………………………………………..’, ; ; ; ; ; ; ‘-,__,\\--\\.
……………………………………………………’-, ; ; ;,,-~’’’ \\ , ,|, |
………………………………………………………’’~-‘’_ , , ,,’,_/--‘
You: lair!
Stranger: HOMO!
You: FAGGOT
Stranger: I love you gurl!
Stranger: jackpot!!!!!
You: JACKPOTTTTTT
Stranger: this is so awesome
You: Out of all these people babe, you got me.
Stranger: Meant to be
You: Of course!!!
Stranger: I am in awe of how amazing this is
You: Fresh out the kitchen momma rollin that body got every man in ignition
Stranger: ok
Stranger: enough of this lol
You: My names Chayce
Stranger: I AM SLEDGE FROM BEL
Stranger: AKA EDDIE
Stranger: lol
Stranger: AKA ROBOTO
You: I AM CHEF FROM BEL
Stranger: AKA LADY GAGA
You: AKA YOGAFLAME
You: AKA MATIX
You: AKA DMARCcccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccc

You: No joke, dicks like purple.
Stranger: Let me tell you something about Janis Ean
You: ight, tell me
Stranger: We were best friends in middle school. I know, right?
You: i have no clue who janis ean is
Stranger: It's so embarrassing. I don't even... whatever.
You: is she hot?
You: Did you fuck her?
Stranger: So then in eighth grade, I started going out with my first boyfriend, Kyle, who was totally gorgeous. But then he moved to Indiana, and Janis was like, weirdly jealous of him.
Stranger: Like, if I would blow her off to hang out with Kyle, she'd be like "Why didn't you call me back?". And I'd be like "Why are you so obsessed with me?". So then, for my birthday party, which was an all-girls pool party, I was like "Janis, I can't invite you because I think you're a lesbian".
You: Keep going.
Stranger: I mean, I couldn't have a lesbian at my party. There were gonna be girls there in their bathing suits. I mean, right? She was a lesbian. So then her mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so retarded.
Stranger: And then she dropped out of school because no one would talk to her, and she came back in the fall for high school, all of her hair was cut off and she was totally weird, and now I guess she's on crack.
You: Oh thats awesome
You: She on that coke diet
Stranger: Dude, you need to see Mean Girls.
You: OH
You: LOOOOOL
You: damn
You: Good one.
Stranger: And as for your purple penis, you may want to get that checked out by your local health care providor.
Stranger: Thank you
You: You troll'd me good.
Stranger: I try.
Stranger: Thank you for taking it well.
You: I enjoyed it.
Stranger: Well, that's good.
Stranger: Off to troll others. Peace out and have a great life.

Stranger: 19/m/usa/bi
You: hooommmmooooooo

Stranger: hello
You: heyy
Stranger: how are you
You: good, and you?
Stranger: fine
Stranger: ur a male!
You: yess you a female?
Stranger: no
Stranger: XD
You: how you no i was male?
Stranger: just guess cuz yur kind of talking
You: oh smart little shit you are
Stranger: yes i am
Stranger: and your like 18-20
Stranger: right?
You: no
Stranger: shit!
Stranger: more than 2-
Stranger: 20
You: no
You: im 10
Stranger: XD
Stranger: lie
You: no lie
You: dead ass
You: you like 23?
Stranger: hhh
Stranger: 16
You: oh
You: cool
You: u like males/
You: ?*
Stranger: no..
Stranger: but u do
You: yes
Stranger: damn
You: love them actually
Stranger: what a guess
Stranger: why?
You: i have no sexuall thoughts about females
You: i just like the feeling of the hard erected penis in my very tight asss!
Stranger: how u know that ur gay in that age?
Stranger: ow can u be so sure
Stranger: how*
You: im 100% positive....... i lost my virginity at 8 to my little brother
Stranger:
Stranger: how old ur brother?
You: 13
Stranger: little brothe....
You: older brother
Stranger: oww
You: im 10
Stranger: and his gay too
You: no, he was just very horny and knew id take it
Stranger: and who know that ur gay?
You: everyone
Stranger: really :d
You: i get picked on at school.......
You: i cut myself
You: i tried to hang myself once..... but my mom came in the room and stopped me
Stranger: why u did that?
You: i get picked on and i have no friends
Stranger: and now its the same?
You: yes... i have no friends
You: only my friend gary, we sit together at lunch
Stranger: where are u from?
You: i live in texas, but i was born in china
You: im adopted
Stranger: ow...
Stranger: special guy
Stranger: always wanted special friend
You: you want to be my friend?
Stranger: sure
You: yayyyy (:
Stranger:
You: where do you live?
Stranger: israel
Stranger: but i live in the senter so i dont feel any bombs...
You: haha, ill give you a bomb to feel
Stranger: ....we have kind of war here...if you dont know
You: yes... the u.s. bombs you
You: cause your a bunch of terrorists
Stranger: what?
Stranger: no
You: yes
You: daddy told me all about you guys
Stranger: i can please tell you my side?
You: go ahead
Stranger: ok...
Stranger: first...israel its a country....
Stranger: country of people
Stranger: and in the country we have aramy that protect us from other peoples taht wamt to kill us..
You: yea we attack you cause you bomb us
You: do you no about 9/11
You: the bombing of the twin towers?
Stranger: yea
You: yea! daddy said we have to get rid of all people like you because of that
You: he said you guys arn't safe
Stranger: i'm sory to tell you that ur daddy blame the wrong people...
Stranger: were not terorist
You: no daddy is right
You: even president obama said so
Stranger: ther is some group of muslim people that want to destroy my country
You: yes we help them
Stranger: why?
You: because of you guys are terrorists
Stranger: but we dont...
Stranger: we just trying to protect our selfs..
You: well you better sleep with one eye open
Stranger: i think u need to ask your father again about israel
Stranger: maybe he told you things and u just mixed them cuz u cant 100% remember
You: no i remember
You: we study this in school
Stranger: ok...
You: well.... have you ever had a sexual thought about a guy?
Stranger: nop
You: im having very sexual thoughts about you
You: .....
Stranger: i dont know how i look like
Stranger: you*
Stranger: you dont know how i look
You: that doesnt matter
You: im to horny to think about that
Stranger: ur just 10 ....
Stranger: omg
Stranger: u see gay porn?
You: oohhhhh all the time
You: when mommy and daddy go to do there "thing" i watch like 30 min videos
You: (:
Stranger: and u blow?
You: blow job?
Stranger: yea
You: i did to my friend gary a couple of times
Stranger: his gay too?
You: and once in school on the playground
You: in the slide
You: yesss he is
Stranger: his in your age?
You: yea
Stranger: and ur just 10...
Stranger: ok...
You: yess
Stranger: so what else u do apart from gay things?
You: well i used to play football but they wont let me anymore cause im gay
You: so i just sit in my room and watch gay porn after school
Stranger: all day?
You: well after i take my nap
You: pretty much yes
Stranger: and your bro still fuck u?
You: well... when his girl broke up with him we had sex like all night
You: but she then wanted him back.....
You: so havent fucked in a while
Stranger: ur parents know?
You: yes
Stranger: they know that he fuck you and they do nothing?
You: well they no my needs and they say that if its ok with me..... its ok with them
You: even my dad has given me a hand job
Stranger: :O
You: when he helps me in the shower he once gave me a bj
Stranger: so you let them fuck u for ther fun?
You: who my parents?
Stranger: parents and ro
Stranger: bro
You: yes...
You: i like it so it doesnt matter to me
Stranger: and now ur 10 and ur bro 13?
You: yes
Stranger: ok...
Stranger: and ur father keep doing it?
You: well.... sometimes not in a while though
You: back when i was like 8
Stranger: how old your father?
You: 29
Stranger: young
You: yea
Stranger: so thats why ur gay...
You: probley... cause my bro says he used to do lots of stuff to me when i was little
Stranger: ok..
Stranger: so u dream about sex every second?
You: most of the time yes
You: one time...... our dog spot got horny and his red penis was showing and i played with it and sucked on it
Stranger: what you tought befor u did it and after
You: what?
Stranger: why u did this
You: i needed some
Stranger: omg
Stranger: ok
Stranger: u need sexual help
You: can you help me
Stranger: i dont think so...
Stranger: i' ar away from you
You: do you think im wierd
Stranger: i'm far*
Stranger: i dont think its you
You: what do you mean?
Stranger: ur family wierd to me
You: oh
You: yea... i get made fun off...
Stranger: but i'm not so sure its reall... sry
Stranger: all that story
You: but it iss
Stranger: u can prove it?
You: if i could
You: i sure would
Stranger: u have facebook?
You: noo
You: thats why i tryd hanging myself..... people were making fun of me and posting stuff on my wall
You: so i deleted it and attempted to hang myslef
Stranger: ...
Stranger: ur bro have facebook?
You: nooo
You: we dont try and asociate ourselfs with the outside world
You: we never go places... us kids leave for school and thats it
You: i have to run home cause i get jumped and picked on
Stranger: whats ur name?
You: chris hansen
Stranger: chtis its name from china?
You: no
Stranger: so...?
You: sooo what?
Stranger: nvm
You: fang-zhi-kai is my chinese name
Stranger: and ur bro name?
You: elroy hansen
You: well my brothers coming in my room
You: he's crying about his girlfriend
You: so....... yea
Stranger: tell him to stick his dick in your mouth and blow ther
Stranger: good luck with the sex

ok i got bored

You: I have sand burn on my penis from when I was at the beach earlier, can you help me relieve the pain?
Stranger: cut it
You: cut what?
You: wouldnt that hurt?
You: i need my penis
Stranger: mother fucker...stop fucking ur mother....then only u will get relief
You: i need some lotion
You: can u bring it on ur way over?

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: I have sand burn on my penis from when I was at the beach earlier, can you help me relieve the pain?
Stranger: ha! what a dumb and creative line.
You: it really hurts when i touch its head
You: IM SERIOUS
You: i got wiped out a few times, and sand got in my pants
You: are you a guy or a girl?
Stranger: i'm a girl. you think a guy would have listend to your penis talk?
You: who knows
You: there r some strange ppl out there
Stranger: doubt it.
Stranger: like the ones who talk about sand burned dicks (:

You:
You: but it really hurts T_T
You: i also have a lot of sunburn
You: (not on my penis though)
You: do u live near the beach?
Stranger: i wish. i live in colorado. you?
Stranger: asl?
You: east coast
Stranger: jealous.
Stranger: a?
You: 17/m
You: u?
Stranger: 16/f
You: ah
You: well becareful of the nutjobs out there, i was talking to some 10yearold chinese boy who was talking about how he loved his incestious gay sex...
You: creeped me out
Stranger: no kidding!


(I added the chinese thing u used phos )

You: Hello
Stranger: hey
You: how are you today?
Stranger: im good, you?
You: well, I have sand burn on my penis from when I was at the beach earlier
You: can you help me relieve the pain?
You: it hurts everytime i touch the head
Stranger: aw, im sorry
Stranger: if i were there, id hellp you out (;
You: really?
Stranger: yeah, really (;
You: awww i wish i had 1 friend, who was as kind as u T_T
Stranger: no one will help you out?
You: no, the only thing my friends do are push me into lockers and slam them on my face
Stranger: thats so mean!!
You: no its not
You: its how they show their love
Stranger: friends dont do that to other friends!
You: in the end, i always repay them for their company
Stranger: oh geez, btw how old are you?
You: my parents keep wondering what happens to all of my money, i just tell them that i didnt have any to begin with
You: 12
Stranger: you should keep those friends if they do that to you
You: really?
Stranger: I MEANT you shouldnt lmao
You: one time, one of the older boys, took out HIS penis, and put it in my butt
You: it felt wierd
Stranger: what??? hahah, oh geezz, that guy must be gay
You: after a while of him putting it in then taking it out, he shoved it in my mouth
You: i didnt like that because it tasted like my cats poop
Stranger: thats disturbing...
You: it wasnt ALL bad
You: i mean, he let me drink the white stuff that came out of his penis
Stranger: haha, so you liked it?
Stranger: lol are you really 12
You: yes why?
Stranger: hw
Stranger: jw*
You: whats jw mean?
Stranger: just wondering
You: oh
Stranger: you have so much to learn haha
You: this is the longest anyone has conversed with me
Stranger: well its because your interesting
Stranger: haha
You: when i was 6 my mommy and daddy decided to play "baby maker" with me
Stranger: baby maker?
You: my daddy sucked my penis while my mommy forced me to lick her butt
Stranger: omg... haha
You: they did all kind of wierd things
Stranger: im sorrry
You: for what?
You: dont all parents spend time with their kids?
Stranger: you liked it?
Stranger: uh, not like that.
You: oh?
You: well, thats the longest time i had to talk to my parents
Stranger: its called incist, where you do it with other family members.
You: do it?
Stranger: sex
You: sex....ive heard that before...
Stranger: i bet you have haha
You: i think it was before the two boys decided to put their dicks in my butt, and another tried choking me with his...
You: that wasnt a fun day
Stranger: what kind of scool do you go to that lets that happen?
You: i go to a catholic school
You: (sometimes the teachers make me undress and they play with my penis)
Stranger: WHAT?! thats crazy!
You: they take the rulers and put them in their front butthole that i dont have...what is that called anyway?
You: is it wierd if i dont have one of those?
Stranger: everyone has a buttwhole
You: but i only have one, and my teacher doesnt have a penis,but has another hole infront
Stranger: thats a vagina
You: oh
Stranger: girls have that
You: those creep me out, they just dont look right
Stranger: LOL, yeah, you have LOTS to learn
You: i know, im only 12, i have a lot of years of school left
Stranger: well it was fun talking to you
Stranger: see yah
You: bye

last one was pure genius

Thanks, I must admit, I do not have the creativity to do some of the ones you guys do

props to xav

You: tell me all about yourself then
Stranger: im a 15 little girl who is a virgin and don't like dirty talks
Stranger: lol
Stranger: its all
Stranger: lol
You: lol then when people ask what do you want to talk about you should say anything especially to someone from the usa
You:
Stranger: why??
You: people from the usa are sex addicts
Stranger: really??
Stranger:
You: yes all they want to do is have lots and lots of sex
You: we are a bad bad country
Stranger: ohh
You: we plan to take over asia and africa just to use them as sex slaves
Stranger: omg
You: i mean i dont entirely agree with it myself but its what our black president wants.
Stranger: realllllllllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyy??
Stranger: obama??
You: yes obama is the antichrist
Stranger: i think he is no
Stranger: *not
Stranger:
Stranger: realllllyyyyyyyy
You: he is the man on a pale horse
You: from the bible
Stranger: omg
You: i know i cant believe it either
Stranger: omg
Stranger:
You: do you read the bible
Stranger: noo
You: well in the bible it said all nations would gather around this one leader. the leader being oboma. and then he would be the antichrist
Stranger: oh my god..no..
You: now
You: its up to you
You: do you want to be a virgin when the americans come in and have sex with you. or do you want to not make it hurt so bad by popping your hymen yourself right now
Stranger: what to be a virgin
You: yes
Stranger: want to be a virgin
Stranger: lol
You: it hurts your first time unless you do it yourself
Stranger: realllly
Stranger: lol
You: honest
You: try popping it right now to save your self the pain when a american comes in and does it to you. if he does it it will make you want to die it will hurt that bad
You: but if you do it it wont hurt
Stranger: I..I might do it
You: believe me, it will be worth it.
Stranger: omg...i just did it...theres so much blood..
You: And you madame, lose. Byeeee
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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Was this conversation great? Download the log

Thats just mean...lol

ha, xavier while i was reading it i was like wtf! i was talking to you!!!
but then i read the bottom!

that was great

Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: lets make things quicker are you A) a normal male B) a normal female C) a horny male D) a horny female
You: well
You: D
Stranger: im c
Stranger: cam?
You: naw
You: lets roleplay
Stranger: k
You: u start
Stranger: i walk into the kitchen after a shower in only a towel you are there
You: yeah this is chris hansen with dateline nbc, we're doing a story on internet predators. Why didn't you listen when she said she was 15?
Stranger: its all cuz of the game sir
Stranger: IT WAS THE GAMES FAULT
Stranger: the game
Stranger: idk
You: You can't blame the game.
Stranger: /b/tard?
You: She's so young. What made you do this?
Stranger: the cookies she gave me cocksucker
You: THEY WERE LACED COOKIES
You: YOU WILL HIT THE FLOOR...NOW
Stranger: BITCHIN THUMP
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: Hi!
You: Hi!

You: how are you today?
Stranger: I am good, how are you?
You: not bad not bad...
You: only complaint is this gapping hole in my stomache
Stranger: Well...that sucks. Someone hungry?
You: some douche decided to stab me with a rusted knife
Stranger: Ohhh I understand
You: he ripped out part of my intestine (i think) and ran off
You: he left a mess that my wife wil NOT be happy about
Stranger: For science probably
You: she gets angry when some1 doesnt clean up a spill
Stranger: Oh I'm sure!
Stranger: Well, sorry bout that incident
You: theres also all this broken glass by the front door
You: oh dont worry about it
You: its not ur fault
You: ...wait
You: its not right?
Stranger: What if it was me?
You: DONT FUCK WITH ME AGAIN
You: GIVE ME MY FUCKING DAUGHTER BACK
Stranger: Okay...I lied it wasn't me
You: DONT LIE TO ME
Stranger: No need to spaz
You: I WILL CUT UR MOTHERFUCKING PENIS OFF

You: AND I WILL SHOVE IT DOWN UR THROAT
Stranger: That may be hard
You: SEW UR MOUTH SHUT
You: THEN STAB U IN THE EYES WITH A RUSTED SPOON
Stranger: Ouch
You: GIVE ME MY DAUGHTER BACK
Stranger: Nope
You: U FUCKING PEDOPHILE
You: I WILL FIND U
You: INFACT
Stranger: No way
You: IM TRACKING UR IP ADDRESS RIGHT NOW
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hi ...male ....18 ....brazil..
You: oh baby
You: i love me some brazillian meet
You: meat* wow i fail at spelling
Stranger: really ?
You: yay, their cocks feel SOOO GOOD in my anus
You: i love the anal sex
You: just love it
Stranger: me too
Stranger: you are m or f ?
You: why dont u come here and find out ;D
Stranger: cool..
Stranger: you are hot yeah ?
You: uknow what i really love? to rub my cock against a brazillian mans cock....oh how great that feeling of penile contact feels.............
You: of course im hot
You: thats how i seduce all of the brazillian men
Stranger: you are gay ?
Stranger: i love dick ..!!
You: i lure them in with my female looks, slip them a ruffee and viagra
You: strap them to a table, and just fuck them away
You: oh baby how i love to hear them scream
You: my favorite part, not gonna lie
Stranger: you are man ?
You: is when i castrate them
You: no silly,
Stranger: f or m ?
You: s
You: but i love to cut off their dicks, take the dicks, and shove them either up their ass, or down their throat
You: once i shoved 5 black men;s dicks up a guys ass and sewed it shut
You: he was crying from the pain
You: (he had it coming) dumbass only had a 3inch long dick
Stranger: ii love dikc..
Stranger: you have msn ?
Stranger: or pictures ?
You: my msn is yourafuckingfaggot,getalive
Stranger: matheus_costa_dantas@hotmail.com
Stranger: add me ?
Stranger: what is your msn ????
You: ok clearly u cant read....
You: but email me at YouAreRetarded@YourHomo.fag
Stranger: i cant read your msn ..
Stranger: give me ..
You: oh, im sry i spelt it wrong
Stranger: pleasee..?
Stranger: add me ..?
You: YourAFuckingFaggot,GetALife, goodluck with finding thoes gay dicks u love
Stranger: matheus_costa_dantas@hotmal.com
You: of course ill add you...because i "LOVE" gay men, they make it easier for me to get the hot women

You: hello?
Stranger: hi
Stranger: m/f
You: whichever u want me to be
Stranger: tell
You: i got it all
Stranger: tell
You: if i hypothetically told u male, what would u do?
You: would u do/say something special?
Stranger: disconnect
You: ok, now if i hypothetically said i was female?
Stranger: than id talk to u and get to know u
You: okay, but , WHAT IF, I said I had the best of both worlds?
Stranger: i dunno
Stranger: can u jus tell
You: well, ill be honest with u, why would use some random chat site (where u cant even SEE the person;s face) to talk to a girl?
You: do u really have that much of a mental issue, or is it physical
You: that no girl wants to talk to u?
Stranger: stfu
You: i want u to seriously ponder this
You: it may help u in the future
You: or is it that u want to talk to a girl so u can finally pretend to be heterosexual?
Stranger: i just want to talk to girl
You: but i ask, why?
You: why do u use an random chat site to talk to a girl?
Stranger: y
Stranger: y r u here
Stranger: ?
You: there r plently of dating sites out there that u can just as easily use
You: im here, because im giving people advice
You: im helping people understand who they truely are
Stranger: r u a girl or not dnt waste my time
You: such as yourself, im trying to help u realize you are either REALLY ugly, really stupid, socially inept, or an in the closet gay
You: or could it be all of the above?
Stranger: fuck off
You: u want me to answer u, but u havent answered me
Stranger: go ahead
You: great answer
You: ur persistance forces me to answer, yes, i am a girl
You: but what makes you think that i want to talk to you? someone who can only use these internet sites to talk to girls?
You: maybe this has something to do with the fact that your mother didn't love you enough and your father might have loved you a little "too" much when u were younger?
Stranger: no 1 wants ur advise so get the fuck off omegle
You: no1 wants to talk to socially inept/sexually inadiqat fools such as yourself
Stranger: r u horny
You: boy am i
Stranger: r u?
You: but, as stated, no1 wants to talk to sexually inadiqat failures such as yourself
You: oh, and if ur penis is below 7inches, you might need to take some pills for u to truely satisfy a woman
Stranger: r u horny thats all im askin
You: i answered, yes
Stranger: can i fuck u
You: wow u really are stupid arent u
You: im not that desprate
Stranger: r u hot
Stranger: ?
You: no, its nice and cool in here, but i am attractive
You: and the best part is, u cant touch this
You: not now, not ever
Stranger: is ur pussy wet
You: uknow, i would rather be raped by a dog than to have sex with u
You: goodnight, creepy child
You have disconnected.

Stranger: hi....lets just get it out of the way....im 16 male and gay
You: Hey, 18 f usa horney... but has aids
You: Looks like you will be in my boat soon enough

lol